Reinforcing with Real Love

By Greg Baer M.D.

November 23, 2012

On October 17, 1989, 7 million people in the San Francisco Bay area were shaken by an earthquake measuring 7.1 on the Richter scale, resulting in the deaths of about 65. Only a few months earlier a quake of lesser severity occurred in the northwest area of Armenia. Although this quake was less violent, and less than one million people lived in the affected area, more than 25,000 people died. In the three towns closest to the epicenter, 50% of the inhabitants died. Why was it that quakes of similar magnitude killed one of 100,000 residents of San Francisco but killed about 1 in 34 in Armenia?

In short, why was the Armenian quake 3000 times more deadly than the quake in California? Simple: mostly the use of reinforcing steel rods or bars–commonly known as rebar–embedded and intertwined in the concrete of the buildings of San Francisco. In Armenia the goal was to erect buildings with the greatest cost efficiency, with little regard to safety. Most buildings were constructed of masonry with no reinforcing steel whatever, and even the multi-story buildings contained far less reinforcement than was required for minimal structural stability.

Ironically, from the outside the Armenian buildings appeared to be solid prior to the quakes. They had even stood for many years, through rain and snow and human use. Almost no one considered that with each brick or stone that was laid, a future disaster was being prepared. No one saw that the buildings, which appeared to be safe on the outside–after all, people lived and worked in them every day–were riddled with weakness, a kind of cancer that would erupt and destroy the inhabitants under the right circumstances.

For a small child, each experience is like a brick or stone or piece of lumber being added to the eventual structure of an adult life. But for most children there is no Real Love in the mix, which means that there is no rebar in the concrete foundation, no rebar in the wall, pieces of lumber that are rotting, and bricks that are laid without mortar. Sometimes such a structure begins to crumble in childhood, or especially adolescence, with outbursts of behavior that obviously indicate something wrong. Mostly, however, people look normal from the outside well into adulthood, just like the buildings in Armenia. But traumatic events–like high winds or earthquakes–are absolutely inevitable, and when these stresses come, a building–a life–without the essential ingredient of Real Love will fare poorly. Walls may crack, the foundation may shift, the roof may collapse, or the entire building may simply fall to the ground.

Begin your children's lives with the Real Love that will guarantee their happiness. If you didn't do that in the beginning, and now you and they are experiencing problems, it's not too late. You can still add the Real Love that will heal old wounds and create the possibility of strength and happiness.

Guarantee their happiness

Eliminate confusion and conflict with your children.

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About the author 

Greg Baer, M.D.

I am the founder of The Real Love® Company, Inc, a non-profit organization. Following the sale of my successful ophthalmology practice I have dedicated the past 25 years to teaching people a remarkable process that replaces all of life's "crazy" with peace, confidence and meaning in various aspects of their personal lives, including parenting, marriages, the workplace and more.

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