Julia called and said, āYouāve spent a lot of time with me. Iāve read the books. Iāve listened to the video chats. But Iām still plagued with fear a lot of the time.ā
āDo you remember how it felt when I was holding you?ā I asked.
āYes.ā
āHow did you feel?ā
āLoved. Safe. Happy. Probably the best moment of my life.ā
āIf you simply remember that youāre loved, the fear leaves. Fear and love cannot co-exist. They just canāt. So, we donāt have to fight fear, only embrace the love, and then the fear just goes away.ā
āBut you canāt be holding me all day.ā
āNo, but you can remember my holding you, and if you trust enough, that memory can banish your fears too.ā
āI donāt understand how just remembering can eliminate my fear.ā
āYou donāt have to understand. You only have to do it. When youāre afraid, your head is just filled with racing thoughts, isnāt it?ā
āYes.ā
āSo change your thoughts. Fill your head with memories of feeling loved, and you wonāt have room for fear and racing thoughts.ā
āHmmm . . .ā
āImagine that you buy a computer,ā I said. āYou want to use it. You ask me for help, and my first recommendation is that you find the cord extending from the back of the computer and plug it into the wall socket. But you respond, āI donāt understand how that would work. What difference would that make?ā But you donāt have to understand, do you? Just plug it in and see what happens. Itās like that here, with your remembering love instead of focusing on fear.ā
Some things cannot be understood until theyāre experiencedātrust, love, and forgiveness, for example. We can talk about them all day, but we canāt know these feelings until we simply try them. What have we got to lose?
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