Can Romance be Real Love? YES!!

By Greg Baer M.D.

January 9, 2015

In more than one place, I have written, “Falling in love is rarely anything more than the relatively equal and abundant exchange of Imitation Love. That may not be romantic, but it’s nonetheless true.”

Overall, that statement is still true, but I have been asked more than once whether romantic love can be Real Love. Oh yes, it can!

On the delightful but regrettably rare occasions when Real Love and romance coincide, it tends to go like this:

  1. You meet someone, and there is just "something" about them that attracts you. It could be physical characteristics, a look in the eye, a sense of humor, an indescribable dignity, an overall bearing—something. THAT part is almost always Imitation Love. It's exciting, stimulating, fulfilling in some way, and not a choice. Call it chemistry. Call it falling in love.
  2. You get to know more about this person and make a CHOICE to love them unconditionally. This is a conscious, higher choice. This takes considerable preparation, which is described in detail throughout the website.
  3. With time you fall even more in love with this person. You make a lifelong commitment to be true partners, and when this relationship becomes a magical combination of Real Love and fun, you just enjoy it. When everything is built on a preceding CHOICE to love unconditionally, you don't need to over-analyze whether you’re having moments of Imitation Love. Just have fun.

With a Real Love partner, sometimes you’ll be giving unconditional love, sometimes you’ll be receiving it, and sometimes you’ll just be having a good time. Relax and do whatever it takes to find a create such a relationship.

Don't know where to start?

Start here:

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About the author 

Greg Baer, M.D.

I am the founder of The Real Love® Company, Inc, a non-profit organization. Following the sale of my successful ophthalmology practice I have dedicated the past 25 years to teaching people a remarkable process that replaces all of life's "crazy" with peace, confidence and meaning in various aspects of their personal lives, including parenting, marriages, the workplace and more.

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