At a recent seminar, Martina said to me, “I know you love me. You’ve proven that on many occasions. But I’ve noticed that when I see you spend time with other people, I feel jealous. It’s like I want to say, ‘He’s MY daddy. Go away.’ I know that’s selfish and childish, but I don’t know how to get rid of that feeling.”
Imitation Love is the engine that drives the world. People are in constant pursuit of attention, approval, power, sex, money, and more. And the supply of those things is limited, so we compete for them. We’re taught from childhood that we must compete for everything.
But then we encounter Real Love, and we don’t quite know how to deal with that. The supply is not limited, so the rules of competition no longer apply.
One of my eight grandchildren is Max, age two. When we visit them, and he first sees me, he wraps his little arms around my neck and says, “MY Grandpa!” It gives him great delight to claim me as belonging solely to him.
What’s remarkable in these interactions is that his siblings, Jack and Sydney, aren’t the least bit jealous when Max claims me as his property. This would be inconceivable in most families where “sibling rivalry” is the norm, but this rivalry only exists in conditions of scarcity and competition. Jack and Sydney have been raised in a home where unconditional love is not in short supply. They have all the love they need, so why would they compete for more, or feel threatened when one person appears to be getting more attention? They wouldn’t, so they hardly even look up when Max is declaring his ownership.
Real Love changes the rules. The supply is infinite, resulting in feelings of abundance, peace, and confidence.
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