Who wants the answer?
(So do your kids.)
I'll teach you HOW you can keep your child from failing and feeling like a failure.
In the video above I taught you:
Failing in school is not a small matter:
Very few parents know the real reason their child is having difficulty with schoolāwith grades, studying, teachers, fellow students.
Why donāt they know?
YOU have the responsibility of identifying your childās challenges. You have to be very aware.
Are your childās grades failing or falling in school?
Do you have a strong feeling that your child could do much better, but simply doesnāt?
Are you plagued with the realization that if your child continues to do poorly, so many doors in the future will be slammed in their face, boxing your child into a corner of poverty and limited choices?
Is your child always behind in his or her homework? Always puts off assignments and does them at the last minute, or fails to do them at all?
Does he or she just look small and afraid? Thatās a tough question for a parent to consider.
Do they worry? This is a big one, so Iāll repeat it: Does your child just have a look of worry on his or her face much of the time? There might be words, there might not.
Do they have unexplained physical symptoms in the morning before school?
Have you directly brought up the subject of bullying and asked them if anybody treats them unkindly at school or anywhere else? Youāll see the answer in their face before you hear it in words.
Have you ASKED them what they like and donāt like about school? If they even pause in answering, something is wrong, something they have avoided discussing with you.
Does your child lack confidence?
Do they seem pessimistic and negative? They might say, for example, āWho cares?ā
Is your child often reluctant to go to schoolāor even other functionsābut isnāt quite clear about why? Often they might say, āI just donāt want to go.ā
Do they get frustrated with doing things and just quit in the middle of jobs or homework or even games?
Do they have a short attention span?
Does your child have difficulty maintaining eye contact with people, possibly even you?
Do they mostly spend time by themselves?
Do most things just ānot matterā to them anymore? Have they quit caring?
Do you see a depressed mood, or loss of interest in their usual activities, or decreased energy?
You might see or hear feelings of worthlessnessāperhaps said in the common phrase, āI canāt do anything right.ā
This is tough stuff for a parent to realize, but many of us canāt seem to make a dent in our childās apparent determination to do as little as possible academically and otherwise. Such children feel small, insignificant, and incapable of trying new things.
They feel less than worthwhile, and this can become crippling, not just in childhood but by establishing a pattern of fear that continues throughout life.
These kids have a greater risk of no friends, loneliness, anxiety, aggressive tendencies, poor self-esteem, under-development of their careers, depression, and suicide. You really do want to be able to help your child, but you just donāt know how.
What would you give to help your child academically and emotionally?
I'm here to tell you that there IS a solution, and weāre not talking about controlling or minimizing the poor performance. That's not nearly enough.
Weāre talking about a real transformation where your child becomes truly happy, fulfilled, responsible, and, well, a human being again. In most cases, what you get is a child much happier than they were before they began having problems in school.
For a long time now, youāve been looking for ways to help your child with his or her confidence. I greatly admire what youāre doing right now. Youāre looking for answers, youāre trying to love and help your child, which is way more than most parents do.
And finally, youāre in the right place.
Itās like youāve been paddling around in the middle of the ocean, desperately looking for help, and nowāalmost unbelievablyāitās here. This is the ship youāve been looking for.
How could I possibly make such an extravagant promise? Because I KNOW how to teach parents how to help their children who are who are shrugging their shoulders with disinterest when it comes to schoolwork.
I know how to help children who are failing school. What I teach has been used by uncounted THOUSANDS of parents, and it works CONSISTENTLY.
Iām not trying to sell you something here that weāre GOING to do. You donāt have to wait. The training begins right now. In the next few seconds, Iāll be teaching you things about your children and yourselves that youāve never known.
I repeat: Iām not here to tell you ABOUT what Iām offering you. Iām beginning now to GIVE you what you need. Itās my gift to you.
What a relief to know that right now youāre exactly where youāve wanted to be. You can learn what you need to learn. Finally, you can feel encouraged. You can feel hope. You can help your child.
And Iām going to help you do that.
I know youāve tried to change things: lots of talking, meetings with teachers and counselors, certainly nagging, standing over their shoulder, programs, yelling, controlling.
But your child is still failing. And youāre frustrated and tired.
Youāve been looking for something that worksādying to find itāand here it is: principles that have proven to work hundreds of thousands of times all over the world.
If parents are thoroughly committed to learning and practicing what Iām going to share with you, predictably I see children begin to succeed in school and become genuinely happy, even after everything else has failed.
You become happy too.
Iām here to help you, and Iāll be using the insight and experience of counseling with thousands of parents, and from writing 20 books and endless articles on the subject, as well as appearing on 1600 radio and television shows and presenting seminars all around the worldāand much more.
You are about to change the world around you, and you donāt have to do it alone, which is miserable and frustrating. Youāve already proven that with your own experience.
So now the question that has to be on your mind: what am I going to teach you that you donāt already know? What am I going to say about your childās school performance and behavior at home that you havenāt already read or heard somewhere?
This is going to be revolutionary for you to hear, so slow down your brain and listen with your soul: What does a child NEED more than anything else? After food, water, and air, the answer is SO obvious, and yet we keep missing itāover and over.
To see the answer, letās start with an infant. When an infant criesāother than from obvious physical paināwhat does he want? You already know, because you just pick him up. Youāre pretty smart. You already know that every child wants to feel cared for. Every child wants to feel LOVED.
Picking them up and holding them is just a demonstration of that. And if youāre genuine in caring about them, they FEEL it.
But infants are relatively easy to love. They smile and melt your heart, make cute little noises, and laugh in ways we never hear anywhere else. Theyāre adorable.
But when they get older, they learn to spill things, make messes, ferociously say NO when you tell them what to do, scream in their car seat, fight with their siblings, refuse to listen to you, say ugly and hateful things to you and other people . . .
And sometimes just give up on trying to succeed and please people, schoolwork being just one example. They get a LOT harder to love, and when that happens, we really donāt know what to do. Usually we try to control their behaviorāand we might even temporarily succeedābut it doesnāt last, and we end up with kids who who are failing and unhappy.
Weāre not so happy either.
Let me say this another way:
If our children become more difficult to love as their behavior changes, that proves we donāt know how to love them UNCONDITIONALLY.
If we love them unconditionally, weād love them no matter what.
But if loving them becomes more difficult when they refuse to do their homework, for exampleāor if we hate it that we have to nag them endlessly to improve their school performanceāour love is conditional.
Unconditional love or Real Love means caring about another person without wanting anything from then in return, but we DO expect something in return for the āloveā we give our children: respect, cooperation, gratitude, and a certain level of reasonable and relatively easy behavior, which which includes them demonstrating an interest in reaching their individual potential in school.
Now more about unconditional love: That kind of love would mean that our love would not be affected by what they do. Thatās what unconditional love means.
But we really donāt know how to do that. How do I know? We PROVE it every time we become angry, or disappointed, or impatient, or irritated at them. Our anger and disappointment and frustration are undeniable PROOF that our love is not unconditional.
Deep inside, you know that what Iām saying is true, but let me demonstrate further: When other people are angry at YOU, do YOU like it? NO, you donāt. Not ever. Nobody does. When other people are angry at us, or when weāre angry at other people, weāre all saying, āLook at what you did to ME, or failed to do FOR ME.ā
In anger, weāre focused on OURSELVESāMe-Me-Meāand in that moment other peopleānotably our childrenāhear only four words, āI donāt love you.ā When weāre angry, weāre far too occupied with ourselves to unconditionally love another person.
I repeat:
I promise you that this is true.
No, we donāt MEAN to say that, but what else COULD people hear while our words, tone, and behavior are screaming ME-ME-ME? āI donāt love youā is what YOU hear and FEEL when people are angry at youāthink about it honestlyāand itās what our children hear and feel when weāre angry at them. And then we have an anxious child or anxious teenager.
Itās little wonder that they respond with their own anger.
Again, we do NOT mean to do this. We do not mean to hurt our children.
But it was inevitable, because WE were not loved unconditionallyāwhich means being consistently loved without disappointment or anger. We were not loved freely, without conditionsāso how could we possibly have learned how to unconditionally love our own children? IMPOSSIBLE.
Nobody is to blame. Our ignorance of Real Love simply perpetuated over generations. We donāt know how to love unconditionally because weāve never seen it or felt it with any consistency.
For emphasis, Iām going to say all this in a slightly different way:
When children behave badlyālike failing in schoolāit is almost always a reaction to them not feeling loved unconditionally. They donāt feel loved without disappointment, irritation, frustration, or anger.
This could sound discouraging, even bleak. In some ways it IS bleak. Look at the worldāat the utter obsession with things that are distractions from our pain, from our not feeling loved: like endless entertainment, addiction to electronics, anger, controlling people, drugs, alcohol, sex, and on and on.
THERE is the proofāin our addiction to all those behaviorsāthat overall we do not know how to love people unconditionally. If we did, and I speak here with vast experience, these behaviors would not exist.
Iāve been teaching unconditional love now for so many years to so many parents that I can tell you this with complete certainty: When a child truly feels loved unconditionally, he or she ENJOYS doing well in life, not just in school.
Instead theyāre HAPPYāand responsible, and have all those qualities you wish they had.
With sufficient love, there is simply no NEED for a child to resist doing well in school and elsewhere. Happy people donāt behave badlyālike refusing to study, for example. Period. Full stop. It seems almost like this statement is too broad, too much. Itās not.
How many times have you wondered why a child isnāt hearing what youāre saying? Thereās an answer, and here it is: Because when youāre irritated, your child hears only āI donāt love you,ā and that is so devastating, that he or she hears none of the rest of the content of what you say.
So THAT is what I'll be teaching you:
How to LOVE your children unconditionally,
which then gives them a REASON to LISTEN to you.
If you love them unconditionally, they can HEAR you āwhat youāre really sayingābecause theyāre not distracted by their fear, not blinded and deafened by the āI donāt love youā message. Then it becomes possible for you to teach them anythingālike how to be loving and responsible themselves.
And if they have that powerful trifectaāthey feel loved, and they are loving and responsibleāthey are guaranteed to be happy, which is the ultimate goal for any parent, or, frankly, any person.
Your children can learn that being happy is way better than giving up and failingāin school or anything else.
Take my hand, and weāll talk about what you can doāand how I will support you. It will almost be like starting over in parenting. Youāre going to LEARN how to be a real parent, and your child will learn the lessons of life that will benefit him or her for the rest of their lives.
If you implement what you learn here, and if you do it consistently, you simply will not believe the differences youāll see in your child, and in you, and in your family.
Imagine it:
no more bad grades,
no more resistance to homeworkānone
no more ugly words,
no more tension in the family,
Itās astonishing to see and to feel.
Our children are not bad. Weāre not bad.
We just have not known how to love and teach them.
What weāre doing with our kids IS NOT WORKING.
Loving and teaching them does.
Rarely is it too late to change whatever unproductive behaviors youāre dealing with, not if youāre really willing to learn and to apply these principles to the interactions with your child. I can promise you, learning how to be a parent is WORTH IT.
Youāre about to learn how to ELIMINATE the fear and failure and other behaviors in your children that are hurting them and making you crazy. Really.
I make you another promise:
Learning to be a loving, effective parent is EASIER than everything else youāve done as a parent.
Weāre really going to get into this. This is not a casual effort. Weāre not looking to make your children more manageable. Thatās not even close to being enough.
Our mission is to help you to become a powerful and effective parent, and to help your child feel loved, and to be loving, responsible, and genuinely happy. Itās a transformation.
If you ARE truly committed to learning how to parent, IāM fully committed to teach you, and I will bring resources to the table you never thought about. The rewards are spectacularāas we have seen in uncounted thousands of families.
Click the button belowāitās freeāto begin transforming your life as a Ridiculously Effective Parent.