Things To Do When You Can’t Find Happiness

By Greg Baer M.D.

October 14, 2016

Being unconditionally loved in person is a powerful experience. It can change your life. But sometimes unconditionally loving people are not readily available, and we’re left wondering what to do with our time. If we do nothing, or if we fall back into old patterns of beliefs, feelings, and behaviors, the results can be destructive. So on the occasions when we wonder what to do, what activities can keep us on the path toward joy?

  1. Go for a walk and listen to Real Love video chats or audio books
  2. Listen to your favorite spiritual music.
  3. Watch an episode of your favorite comedy.
  4. Find somebody in your neighborhood with a dog and offer to walk the dog.
  5. Lie down, do some deep breathing, put your hand on your chest, and vividly remember somebody loving you. This can be very real.
  6. Send an email to someone who needs some encouragement. Tell them you love them.
  7. Take a nap. Rejuvenate.
  8. Pray. Look for feeling God’s love.
  9. Read from a Real Love book.
  10. Listen to a spiritual audio book that really helps you feel connected.
  11. Email or text somebody and ask for a call to connect.
  12. Write to somebody who loves you, and as you write, FEEL the connection that comes just from the writing, whether you get send the email or text, or you don’t.
  13. Call a friend or fellow to ask them how THEY are. Don't share your problems. Love and listen to THEM.
  14. Read some scripture
  15. Read one of the emails that you’ve received that made you feel connected or happy or elevated.
  16. Go and be of random, anonymous service. Pick up litter or something that helps the planet or others.
  17. Sit still for at least 5 minutes in silence and gratitude.
  18. Complete one task around your house. Clean up something. File some receipts. Clean off a shelf.
  19. Watch a video chat
  20. Give away a Real Love book or audiotape to somebody you love.
  21. Find an older person in neighborhood who is lonely, somebody who will allow you with little or no notice to come over and read to them or listen to them.
  22. Find someone who needs a ride to group, or tuition to a seminar, or something that would allow them to experience Real Love more fully.
  23. Remember what’s TRUE in your life—the love you have—instead of focusing on the fears, which are illusions.
  24. Contact local volunteer organizations and find one that can use the amount and frequency of time you have available. Some of them might just let you show up periodically.
  25. Imagine yourself being held in the arms of somebody holding you.
  26. Arrange to be held by somebody who really loves you.
  27. Read the many blogs on the website
  28. Send a blog or other part of the website to someone you love.
  29. Write out a list of what you are grateful for. If you’re truly grateful, you can’t be afraid or unhappy at the same time.
  30. Remember the Five Truths.
  31. Write or read a post on the Real Love Group Facebook page.
  32. Call someone you had a disagreement with, and admit how you were wrong.
  33. Pick one Real Love truth and play with it: sing about it, paint it onto a canvas, or sketch it into a notebook.
  34. Walk outside with your eyes and soul open. No electronics.
  35. Never stop moving forward.
  36. Ask yourself what expectation you’re having of other people? Do you have that right?
  37. Abandon all pain from the past and all fear from the future, and choose to live in the joy of right NOW.
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Replace your frustration & confusion with peace and happiness.


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About the author 

Greg Baer, M.D.

I am the founder of The Real Love® Company, Inc, a non-profit organization. Following the sale of my successful ophthalmology practice I have dedicated the past 25 years to teaching people a remarkable process that replaces all of life's "crazy" with peace, confidence and meaning in various aspects of their personal lives, including parenting, marriages, the workplace and more.

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