Remember WHY you came here.
Right now, dig in to HOW you can help your child.
You're one click away from SUCCEEDING.
In the video above I taught you:
Look for the following behaviors or conditions in your child. Ask yourself honestly what you see.
Do you have to remind them of every chore and responsibility they’re given? Over and over?
Do they put off completing the assignments you give them, even the ones that would take them almost no time to do? Do they put off their homework consistently and create last-minute crises before deadlines and tests?
Are they late to almost everything?
Have you gotten to the point where you just want to avoid having conversations with this child who has to be told everything two, three, and more times?
Do you recognize that behind every avoidance of responsibility is a burning sense of entitlement? Do you recognize how you enable that entitlement?
Are teachers at school having more and more trouble with your child or teenager?
Do you hear a lot of complaining about every little thing?
Do you have to remind them of their bed time over and over?
Do you hear excuses for everything? “Oh, I didn’t have time,” for example?
Do they complain and whine when you assign them tasks to do?
Do they put off their homework consistently and create last-minute crises before deadlines and tests?
Do you and other family members have to wait on them before you leave for events, where you are often late?
Is the idea of reminding your child to do something once again a nightmare?
Do they refuse to take responsibility for their own mistakes and lack of preparation?
Do you hear a common cry of how “It’s just not fair”?
Do you get the feeling that if you let them, they would do nothing but use their phone and eat?
Have you noticed that even when they claim a task is “done,” the truth is that they did the absolute least they could? You assign them to clean the kitchen, for example, but they only wipe off one counter?
Do you have to get them up in the morning, amidst one complaint after another?
All this gets kind of old, doesn’t it? It turns you into a nagging machine, having to follow them around and push them to do everything. They’re not learning, and you’re hating it. They’re difficult to be around and nearly impossible to reach.
They’re creating patterns that will destroy their happiness and relationships, often for life.
Irresponsible children become irresponsible teenagers, who then become the adults who fail in school, careers, and relationships. And then—often too late—everybody is mystified how it came to all that.
Somehow you know this is far bigger than only an inconvenience to you. It’s really hurting THEM. You’re worried.
What would you give to help your child have a responsible and happy life? What would you give to find a solution for the nagging and inaction and all that “attitude?” How badly would you like to do something about that sense of entitlement that has changed the soul of your child?
Would you not give almost anything to change this? Sometimes you’d rather live on the moon than hear another excuse. Are you not tired of it? There IS a solution, and we’re not talking about controlling or minimizing these behaviors.
We’re talking about eliminating them.
We’re talking about a real transformation where your child becomes truly happy, fulfilled, responsible, and, well, a real human being.
For a long time now, you’ve been looking for ways to help your child. I greatly admire what you’re doing right now. You’re looking for answers — you’re trying to love and help your child — which is way more than most parents do.
And finally, you’re in the right place.
It’s like you’ve been paddling around in the middle of the ocean, desperately looking for help, and now—almost unbelievably—it’s here. This is the ship you’ve been looking for.
How could I possibly make such an extravagant promise? Because I KNOW how to teach parents how to teach their children to be responsible.
I’m not trying to sell you something here that we’re GOING to do. You don’t have to wait. The training begins right now. In the next few seconds, I’ll be teaching you things about your children and yourselves that you’ve never known.
I repeat: I’m not here to tell you ABOUT what I’m offering you. I’m beginning now to GIVE you what you need. It’s my gift to you, whether you continue with me or not.
What a relief to know that right now you’re exactly where you’ve wanted to be. You can learn what you need to learn. Finally, you can feel encouraged. You can feel hope. You can help your child.
And I’m going to help you do that.
I know you’ve tried to change things: certainly nagging, books, programs, yelling, controlling. But your child still is still irresponsible, whines, complains, and makes excuses.
And you’re frustrated and tired.
You’ve been looking for something that works, and here it is: principles that have proven to work hundreds of thousands of times all over the world.
If parents are thoroughly committed to learning and practicing what I’m going to share with you, predictably I see children lose their depression (it just goes away), and instead they become happy—even after everything else has failed.
You become happy too.
I’m here to help you, and I’ll be using the insight and experience of counseling with thousands of parents, and from writing 20 books and endless articles on the subject, as well as appearing on 1600 radio and television shows and presenting seminars all around the world—and much more.
You are about to change the world around you, and you don’t have to do it alone, which is miserable and frustrating. You’ve already proven that with your own experience.
So now the question that has to be on your mind: what am I going to teach you about raising a responsible child that you don’t already know?
What am I going to say that you haven’t already read in a parenting book or heard from a program somewhere?
This is going to be revolutionary for you to hear, so slow down your brain and listen with your soul: What does a child NEED more than anything else? After food, water, and air, the answer is SO obvious, and yet we keep missing it—over and over.
To see the answer, let’s start with an infant. When an infant cries—other than from obvious physical pain—what does he want? You already know, because you just pick him up. You’re pretty smart. You already know that every child wants to feel cared for. Every child wants to feel LOVED.
Picking them up and holding them is just a demonstration of that. And if you’re genuine in caring about them, they FEEL it.
But infants are relatively easy to love. They smile and melt your heart, make cute little noises, and laugh in ways we never hear anywhere else. They’re adorable.
But when they get older, they learn to spill things, make messes, ferociously say NO when you tell them what to do, scream in their car seat, fight with their siblings, refuse to listen to you, say ugly and hateful things to you and other people . . .
and their anger and entitlement keep building like a storm. They get a LOT harder to love, and when that happens, we really don’t know what to do. Usually we try to control their behavior—and we might even temporarily succeed—but it doesn’t last, and we end up with kids who are still lazy, irresponsible and unhappy.
We’re not so happy either.
Let me say this another way:
If our children become more difficult to love as their behavior changes, that proves we don’t know how to love them UNCONDITIONALLY.
If we love them unconditionally, we’d love them no matter what.
But if loving them becomes more difficult when they’re difficult when they behave badly, our love is conditional.
Unconditional love or Real Love means caring about another person without wanting anything from then in return, but we DO expect something in return for the “love” we give our children: respect, cooperation, gratitude, and a certain level of reasonable and relatively easy behavior, which does not include the symptoms of depression.
Now more about unconditional love: That kind of love would mean that our love would not be affected by what they do. That’s what unconditional love means.
But we really don’t know how to do that. How do I know? We PROVE it every time we become angry, or disappointed, or impatient, or irritated at them. Our anger and disappointment and frustration are undeniable PROOF that our love is not unconditional.
Deep inside, you know that what I’m saying is true, but let me demonstrate further: When other people are angry at YOU, do YOU like it? NO, you don’t. Not ever. Nobody does. When other people are angry at us, or when we’re angry at other people, we’re all saying, “Look at what you did to ME, or failed to do FOR ME.”
In anger, we’re focused on OURSELVES—Me-Me-Me—and in that moment other people—notably our children—hear only four words, “I don’t love you.” When we’re angry, we’re far too occupied with ourselves to unconditionally love another person.
I promise you that this is true.
No, we don’t MEAN to say that, but what else COULD people hear while our words, tone, and behavior are screaming ME-ME-ME? “I don’t love you” is what YOU hear and FEEL when people are angry at you—think about it honestly—and it’s what our children hear and feel when we’re angry at them. And then we have an anxious child or anxious teenager.
It’s little wonder that they respond with their own anger.
Again, we do NOT mean to do this. We do not mean to hurt our children.
But it was inevitable, because WE were not loved unconditionally—which means being consistently loved without disappointment or anger. We were not loved freely, without conditions—so how could we possibly have learned how to unconditionally love our own children? IMPOSSIBLE.
Nobody is to blame. Our ignorance of Real Love simply perpetuated over generations. We don’t know how to love unconditionally because we’ve never seen it or felt it with any consistency.
For emphasis, I’m going to say all this in a slightly different way:
When children behave badly—when they consistently fail to do what you've told them to do, for example—it is almost always a reaction to them not feeling loved unconditionally—which means to be loved with no disappointment, irritation, frustration, or anger.
This could sound discouraging, even bleak. In some ways it IS bleak. Look at the world—at the utter obsession with things that are distractions from our pain, from our not feeling loved: like endless entertainment, addiction to electronics, anger, controlling people, drugs, alcohol, sex, and on and on.
THERE is the proof—in our addiction to all those behaviors—that overall we do not know how to love people unconditionally. If we did, and I speak here with vast experience, these behaviors would not exist.
I’ve been teaching unconditional love now for so many years to so many parents that I can tell you this with complete certainty: When a child truly feels loved unconditionally, he or she DOES NOT complain and make excuses about what they were supposed to do but didn’t.
Instead they’re HAPPY—and responsible, and have all those qualities you wish they had.
With sufficient love, children ENJOY being responsible. They ENJOY the freedoms and privileges that come from responsible behavior. Happy people LIKE the feeling of accomplishing things and of being a contribution to the family.
They simply don’t resist doing what’s RIGHT. Period. Full Stop. It seems almost like this statement is too broad, too much. It’s not.
How many times have you wondered why a child isn’t hearing what you’re saying? There’s an answer, and here it is: Because when you’re irritated, your child hears only “I don’t love you,” and that is so devastating, that he or she hears none of the rest of the content of what you say.
So THAT is what I'll be teaching you:
How to LOVE your children unconditionally,
which then gives them a REASON to LISTEN to you.
If you love them unconditionally, they can HEAR you —what you’re really saying—because they’re not distracted by their fear, not blinded and deafened by the “I don’t love you” message. Then it becomes possible for you to teach them anything—like how to be loving and responsible themselves.
And if they have that powerful trifecta—they feel loved, and they are loving and responsible—they are guaranteed to be happy, which is the ultimate goal for any parent, or, frankly, any person.
Your children can learn that being happy is way better than avoiding responsibility. They LIKE being responsible.
Take my hand, and we’ll talk about what you can do—and how I will support you. It will almost be like starting over in parenting. You’re going to LEARN how to be a real parent, and your child will learn the lessons of life that will benefit him or her for the rest of their lives.
If you implement what you learn here, and if you do it consistently, you simply will not believe the differences you’ll see in your child, and in you, and in your family.
no more whining or complaining
when they are told to do their chores,
or homework, or any kind of WORK,
no more nagging—celebration!
no more lies,
no more ugly words,
no more tension in the family,
It’s astonishing to see and to feel.
Our children are not bad. We’re not bad.
We just have not known how to love and teach them.
What we’re doing to help our kids with their laziness IS NOT WORKING.
Loving and teaching them does.
Rarely is it too late to change whatever unproductive behaviors you’re dealing with, not if you’re really willing to learn and to apply these principles to the interactions with your child. I can promise you, learning how to be a parent is WORTH IT.
You’re about to learn how to ELIMINATE the anger and entitlement and other behaviors in your children that are hurting them and making you crazy. Really.
I make you another promise:
Learning to be a loving, effective parent is EASIER than everything else you’ve done as a parent.
We’re really going to get into this. This is not a casual effort. We’re not looking to make your children more manageable. That’s not even close to being enough.
Our mission is to help you to become a powerful and effective parent, and to help your child feel loved, and to be loving, responsible, and genuinely happy. It’s a transformation.
If you ARE truly committed to learning how to parent, I’M fully committed to teach you, and I will bring resources to the table you never thought about. The rewards are spectacular—as we have seen in uncounted thousands of families.
Click the button below—it’s free—to begin transforming your life as a Ridiculously Effective Parent.
Remember WHY you came here.
Right now, dig in to HOW you can help your child.
You're one click away from SUCCEEDING.